For the past few days, my mom and I have been cleaning out my abuela's shop in the downtown market here in her hometown in Mexico.
It's been really tough but also nostalgic, fulfilling, and joyful at times too. A cocktail of emotions.
Like my mom said, this shop is full of her energy...just hers. When we cleaned out the family house this January, it was full of her and my abuelo's stuff...but this? It's all her.
I spent so many days here as a kid on summer and winter vacations and during that time my abuela taught me my first few lessons in entrepreneurship as I watched her sell.
She had systems in place that helped her thrive in her industry like secret codes on items which symbolized the price she paid so that she could negotiate while still turning a profit.
In Mexico, prices in stores like hers always fluctuated, and so did she, always changing with the tides of new decades.
When the border got rough around 2010, she saw a big decline in people visiting her shop but still went in every day in devotion to the legacy she created/continued (her mom, my great-grandma also had a shop there).
She got flexible, did what she could to adapt, and then three years later, she died.
Now, ten years after her passing, I'm hit with a new wave of grief. One that feels softer but a little more final. This tienda was her last physical space. Her last energetic piece of the world.
Saying goodbye to her shop and the things in it feels like I'm saying goodbye to her...tears streaming down my face as I write this...
I wish she was still here. Still alive. Still sitting in the same maroon chair she always used in there. Grief is funny right? Comes in waves and never really goes away...
As one of my friends recently reminded me though, I have a spiritual relationship with her, which feels way more important than a physical 3D link to her past. And even still...it's hard.
So if you're able to, send good vibes and energy as we send her and the shop off this week, especially to my mom who's been carrying most of the weight for the family.
And if you're also grieving the loss of someone or something, here's a video just for you <3
In it, you'll discover...
- Three steps to heal your grief.
- Ways to honor and remember your loved ones.
- How to move emotions through so they don't get stuck.
Click here to watch and let it bring you some grief relief <3
All my love,
Kimberly
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